Losing weight is expensive!

Now here comes to bitchy post that will cause resentment (even from my future self), but I gotta say it:
Losing weight is expensive!

I'm not even talking about the cost of food (though I do seem to drop a fair amount more per pound at the Farmer's Market than the grocery store) or gym membership (worth every penny). I'm not even talking about "time-is-money" expensive (though I did spend 2 hours running, 1.5 hours in yoga class and 1.5 hours with the trainers last week).

I'm talking about new clothes.

I'm in the slow process of downgrading my pants from size 12 down to 10. It's really exciting - I literally jumped around and did a little dance in the Ann Taylor LOFT fitting room the first time I got a size 10 to zip up (especially since the khakis were on sale!) - but also, in a way, not cool at all. What about all the awesome size 14 and 16 jeans that I invested in? What about all the dresses that are suddenly baggy, or my favorite sweaters that look like they're hanging off of me? I love those clothes! I spent years amassing that wardrobe ... and now, POOF, I look stupid in all of it!

I don't know what to do with the old clothes - I like them too much to donate them (I'm selfish and they have a lot of sentimental value) and I also fear that some day I'll re-gain the weight and be upset that I gave them away. Should I hang on to them because I'm anticipating failure? Wouldn't a closet full of only clothes the right size be a motivator instead of a deterrent?

I'm not sure what I think about it anymore, I just know that pretty soon, I may need to get another job in order to pay off my new wardrobe. And it will totally be worth it.

Why I Run

A few days ago I got a postcard from my friend Tim. He wrote it with his mom, who saw on facebook that I had been running more & wanted to know why. “Are you going to run a marathon?” they asked on the postcard.

At first, I was glad that they noticed my newfound interest, but after a few days, the question on the postcard kind of got under my skin, because I couldn’t figure out a witty, postcard friendly response back as to why I run.

So I took this question, “why are you running?” out on the road with me for my Saturday long run. Here’s what I came up with:

I run because … I didn’t think I could.

· I started running with the Cool Running’s Couch-to-5K program and at first, I could barely pump out the 2-3 minute running drills … but as I continued, I watched my stamina grow and my strength increase, and I liked that feeling.

· From that first time out, I’ve been continually impressed at how my body has stepped up to the challenges of pushing harder and harder. Today, I wasn’t sure when I stepped out the door if I’d be able to go 5 miles, but at around 55 minutes and 4.6 miles, I knew that I’d be able to crank out not only 5 miles, but probably give it a little more after that. (Finished 5.25 mi in 1:08.)

I run because … I like the music.

· Running gives me the right to compile all my guilty pleasure songs into one playlist, from Michael Jackson to Kevin Rudolf.

· There’s something thrilling about half-dancing in a public place with the chance that someone may be watching – for example, when I mimic raising my glass to the “L’Chaim” moment in Black Eyed Peas’ “I Gotta Feeling.”

· Like Kanye West says in “New Workout Plan,” I’m aspiring to get an NBA player as a boyfriend and feel less guilty about it when I run to this.

· It gives me something to talk about when I meet up with Corey Paige – which Candid songs really get me to hit my stride.

I run because … the economy needs consumer stimulation.

· I would feel terrible if Brooks shoes went under. That’s why I keep buying their newest model, without fail, every 4-6 months. (Currently running in Dyad 5’s.)

· Plus, I would feel even worse if I spent $100 on shoes and then let them sit alone in my closet. “Brilliant shoes are meant to be worn” is one of my life mantras and it applies just as equally to running sneakers as it does to my favorite strappy Mary-Jane Cole Haans.

· On top of it, running has a ton of technology that I love to tap into – not only the shoes and jackets and sports bras and socks (yes, I have special running socks so I don’t get blisters) – but also the Nike+ sensor and iPod receiver. I love technology.

I run because … I not only feel healthier: I am healthier.

· In the past year, my cholesterol has dropped 40 points – my doctor told me that my numbers looked as if I were on lipid inhibitors and added, “Whatever you’re doing, keep doing it, because it’s working.”

· My body has toned up and slimmed down by 15 lbs in the past year . My resting heart rate has dropped. I sleep better at night. I choose healthier foods so as not to “waste” a workout.

· On the other hand, running gives me the right to some guilt-free splurging because I know I’ve already burned the calories I’m about to consume. Favorite Boston-based splurges: Boloco summer burrito and JP Licks Oreo cookie-dough ice cream. Mmmm, just mentioning them makes my mouth water. I think you know where to find me after today’s run …

I run because …. I am a strong, independent woman.

· Living alone, there are some days when the first human interaction I have is on a morning run. I need those faces, because I fear that some day I will become a crazy cat lady – and if the amount of talking I do to my cat is any indication, I’m already on my way.

· I know if I were put in a dangerous situation, I would have self-defense skills … but this way I also know I could take off and outrun the bastard if need be. After kneeing him in the crotch, of course.

I run because … it invigorates me and makes me a better person.

· I always thought it was kind of BS when people said things like this. “You’re moving your legs quickly, how can that make you a better person?” But …

· Running gives me time to clear my head from all the gunk that fills it up the rest of the day.

· Running gets me out into nature and forces me to breathe fresh air and enjoy sunshine.

· Running challenges me to beat my time from weeks and months prior.

· Running gives me time to reflect on the past day and pray for the days ahead.

· Running gets toxicity out of my body through sweat and breath.

· Running makes me feel alive and like whatever else I do, that day has not gone to waste.

And now, for the best part of a good run, I’m going to go reap the best benefit of all: a guilt-free nap. L’Chaim.

(PS In case you don’t believe my reasons, while I was in the process of writing this, Women’s Health posted a very similar article that underscores everything I’ve said here.)

Learn from Every Run

Yesterday I was scheduled for a 4.5 mile run. I knew that I'd been slowly working up to that mileage and I knew that my body would probably be able to handle it - that my heart would keep beating, my lungs would keep inhaling and exhaling in time, my legs would set the pace.
But what I didn't know was my brain could keep up. 4.5 miles? At my average pace (last week I averaged a 12:50 mi), that's just under an hour of running.

So at 9:20 am, I left my house with trepidation en route to the Charles River path. Here are some of the things I discovered:

- Trying to pace myself slower is difficult. I was attempting, for at least my first mile, to average around a 13:30 mile. I had trouble staying that slow ... now that's something I wasn't expecting to experience for a long time!
- Going to bed early isn't the only battery charging I need. Next time, I will fully charge my iPod. I probably left with about 75% battery life, but since I was running to music AND Nike+, it ate up my battery life much more rapidly than I anticipated.
- Don't wear running shorts over 4 miles. Thighs = OUCH. Guess it's back to the tighter capris for running this fall!
- Plan out longer routes in advance - not only because I ran out of power and couldn't use my iPod to gauge distance (which is always a bit off anyway), but also because I forgot that my last mile was uphill. That was poorly planned! I'd rather sprint it out until the end and feel great about myself and walk farther in my cool down than exhaust myself in the last push!

Because of my lack of planning, I only ran 4.2 miles out of my planned 4.5 ... but even so, I completed that 4.2 in 54 minutes, meaning my average pace was 12:55. Not bad for my longest run yet!

According to the schedule set by Runners World's SmartCoach, tomorrow I should do my first speed workout (4 miles) and on Saturday the plan is to run 5 miles. WOW. Let's see if my brain can keep up with my body on this one!